Why?

It's a fair question when faced with what seems to be a very unfair situation. It's hard to know why God allows me to hurt when He says He loves me so much. It's hard to know why He doesn't fix things when I know He has the power. And so, like millions before me, I ask God, why? I know the answer of course. He is saying, "I know why and that's all you need to know. Trust my plan for your life." But to be perfectly honest, that just doesn't feel like enough of an answer some days. I feel like telling Him, "Easy for you to say God, you already know the answer!" Does He remember how frail we are? He did make us after all. He must know that we are weak and need reassurance and extra grace and encouragement and help. Does He forget that we are made of clay and spit and can crumble and fall apart? I know that I will be stronger in the end, I know that this will draw me closer to God and I know I will survive. I get it. I get the story about the refiner's fire. But it hurts to be forged in the fire! It burns and it blisters and it hurts! So tonight I will crawl under the covers, burning, and ask God why and hopefully, will feel the cool touch of His hand and the cold healing waters and wake up hurting less than when I went to bed.