My Saturday Storm
On Saturday, I felt utterly and totally alone in this world. It was an excruciating day. I have never felt such complete isolation and the feelings of being 'trapped' in my circumstances shrouded my perceptions and filled me with self-pity and anger. I knew of course that these feelings where not of God and I cried out to Him to help me and fill me with His love and presence. I didn't feel it. Somehow, I made it through to Sunday and things started to look brighter. And as I looked back over Saturday's dark hours I came to the realization that I will now always have a tender heart for the lost and lonely of this world. And then I started to wonder if perhaps God could use this new, first-hand knowledge of loneliness to touch the lives of others. And instead of asking Him to remove this burden, I will now ask Him to use it for His glory. The second thing I learned from my Saturday Storm, is that feeling God's presence is not as important as believing it. I need to claim the truth of the promise that God will never leave us and is nearest in times of intense sadness regardless of how I feel. This is the essence of true faith. And then I learned that I don't need others to feed me my joy and security, but that the "Joy of the Lord is my strength." And so, that is why I choose the picture above to accompany this blog. Even standing alone in the midst of a vast and at times unfriendly sea, I can still thrive and grow and be strong and sturdy and find joy because my roots are anchored in Jesus and He will hold me fast.
"He will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit."
~ Jerimiah 17:8
"He will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit."
~ Jerimiah 17:8
posted by The Faith Expedition at 11:21 a.m.
4 Comments:
Hello Becky
This past Sunday my pastor was back on leave from the Army hospital in Landsthul Germany. His unit was activated and he is serving as Chaplian there. He told of much sorrow, but great faith and working of God in that setting. very interesting message. Here is the link.
http://www.eastparkway.org/html/audio.shtml
"nobody knows the trouble i've seen, nobody knows but Jesus" ... and isn't that the truth of the matter ... tho' through the troubles, we atleast can empathsize and help carry someone elses load of care ... ((hugs))
I'm sorry you felt so alone. I have felt that way. I do know that in the times when I did feel that way, as hard as they were, that the Lord needed me to make Him my one and only source of fulfillment: not my husband or even my children...no one who understands, sees, feels...and there was the Lord saying, "Teresa, it is Me".
Becky, what a powerful post! I especially liked your last sentence, "Even standing alone in the midst of a vast and at times unfriendly sea, I can still thrive and grow and be strong and sturdy and find joy because my roots are anchored in Jesus and He will hold me fast." I would have to say you, like Peter, just walked on water. Congratulations! {{hugs}}
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