Grace Under Pressure

I haven't slept in two nights. Baby has a cold. I felt angry and frustrated this morning and said stupid things like, "why can't I ever get a break?" and, "The whole universe is working against me right now!" And then the words 'Grace under pressure' flew across my exhausted brain. I've never been good at going without sleep. It always brings out the worst in me. I remember as a teenager going to a ski resort for the weekend with friends. They'd be up til dawn playing board games, laughing loudly, running around...and there I'd be, wrapped up in my sleeping bag with my pillow over my head, fuming and muttering about not getting enough sleep. I need sleep. About nine hours please! And here I am, I haven't slept in a year! I'm pretty cranky by this stage. And through it all, I have prayed and asked my Father to grant me just one good nights sleep. To no avail. As a matter of fact it seems as if when I ask Him for a good night, it is the worst night ever! I just don't get it. Okay, maybe I do. Maybe God is teaching me to persevere, hold up under stress & pressure, be exhausted but keep smiling and find a good attitude along the way. Be a woman of strength and grace Becky! "His grace is sufficient to supply all your needs according to His riches in Glory." And once again I am reminded that this too, these sleepless nights and long lonely days will be used for my good. As I crawl under my quilt for a nap this afternoon, I will ask God to supply my needs and if He can't give me sleep, grant me the grace and strength I need to get through my day with a positive attitude, a luminous face, and peace in my heart that He alone knows what I need.