Standing Firm

Thank you to those dear blogging buddies who allowed me to rant and share my feelings on last nights blog, even if they were angry. Today, I felt very much like the tree in the picture above. The winds were blowing, but I stood firm. There were tears today and feelings of lonliness, self-pity, frustration. You name it, I felt it! But I sit here tonight at my computer and I find myself still deeply rooted in God's love. And though the winds blow, I will bend and sway but I will not break. Also, like the tree above, I feel like I am standing alone on this shore and must learn what I must learn, and face what I must face, and endure what I must endure...alone. Yes, I can have friends to support me and pray for me. But ultimately, I must go through this on my own. I'm not afraid anymore. I was terrified just a couple of weeks ago. I was sure that I could not stand alone. I thought I would bend and break and fly into a million splinters. But God has been merciful to me. He has held me firm! Oh, how Satan would love to see me fall. There are moments when I am sure he is rubbing his hands together in anticipation. "Here she goes, any second now she's going to crumble and give up. Listen to her tears. She's so sad. She can't still believe that God loves her. Not in the midst of such despair." And then, my Saviour comes and His hands slip beneath my head. He raises me up and wipes away my tears and breathes His strength and power right into the core of me. And I feel a surge of love and peace. I feel hope. I feel such love for my husband. I am consumed with it! And Satan screams. As I crawl under my quilt tonight, I will claim this image as one representing this time in my life. Stormy but beautiful. An image of strength, endurance and victory!

The righteous will flourish like a palm tree, they will grow like a cedar of Lebanon. Psalm 92:12